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"Toxic People" And Why You Need To Stop Saying That.

"Toxic People", "Toxic Person", "They're Toxic" 

You've seen these terms bandied around social media, books, workshops, you name it, they have very much become common language in our everyday conversations and environments. And that's a problem. Why? Because, if you are using these terms, you're just not thinking. Period.

Look, this isn't a judgement of you if you are using these terms, rather a reality check. Cut this stuff out of your vocabulary immediately. Firstly, you're trashing the very first ideal of personal growth, i.e. you're more interested in analyzing others than yourself. Wind your neck in. Focus on you.

Secondly, you're separating yourself from people when you use alienating language like this. You're dehumanizing others.

Thirdly. Have you ever considered what you are doing to yourself, who you are becoming in relating to other people in this way? This impacts you in ways you cannot imagine.

Lastly, in life, people can be assholes. It would be a big mistake for you to forget that you are people too.

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5 comments


  • Hooray! If everyone starts judging others as toxic, the world will be full of lonely people. Communicate. Work things out. Forgive and look for the good in people. Blessed are the merciful.

    Linda on

  • There are toxic people (I prefer the term “real assholes”), whatever you like to call them. They should be avoided. Having said that, truly toxic people are rare (in my life) and I keep them out of my life. The toxic people in my life proved this about themselves over decades. I do not take this term lightly. I tolerate regular assholes, as you can grow from them. Truly toxic people have destructive impacts on your life. Avoid them or set some serious boundaries if ya can’t.

    I count trees for a living, please take my take with a grain of salt…..

    Stork on

  • i guess shithole is out of the question then. I will try “Thou offends”

    Michael on

  • Agree! Drop toxic, replace with: underdeveloped and look at self first. Teachers show up regularly in ones life in many of life’s domains. Stay vigil, seek the gold. Be kind and straight, become masterful with communication (inbound and outbound filters). There are always opportunities to learn from “people” and other resources that offer data. Stay open and pliable. It doesn’t mean you have to be a doormat.

    Betsy Gordon on

  • I personally don’t use or like the term “toxic” but I have an understanding of people that are bad for me and my family. After all don’t we want – - or actually need to separate ourselves from some people?

    Teresa Meyer on

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